SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
