I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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