Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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