My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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