My liver just broke up with me...
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
