I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize