:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
No I am not eating basil off your cock
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Randomize
