Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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