you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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