As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
