so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I won't apologize to a one balled man
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize
