I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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