P.S. I can't hear my feet
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
