He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
