is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
