I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
