that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize