North Korea, Best Korea!
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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