You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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