Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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