I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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