Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I lost the right to judge tonight
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
