Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
