I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
