I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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