garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
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