Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
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Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
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I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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