what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
