Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
