I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
