Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
