Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize