You just made me feel so damn special
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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