Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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