yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
