I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
