i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
