in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
