saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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