Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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