Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize