Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
