Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
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He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
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Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
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