do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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