it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
