do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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