So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
