i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
