remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Every concussion has its silver lining
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
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