matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
