I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
